What is a Dialectic?

The What is a Dialectic? handout is a practical introduction to one of the core concepts in Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT): learning how two seemingly opposing things can both be true at the same time. This resource helps people move away from rigid black-and-white thinking and develop more flexible, balanced, and emotionally skilful ways of understanding themselves, relationships, and difficult situations.

Using relatable examples and easy-to-understand explanations, this handout explores how dialectical thinking can reduce inner conflict, emotional intensity, relationship tension, and impulsive reactions. It demonstrates how replacing “BUT” with “AND” can radically shift thinking patterns and create space for both acceptance and change.

This resource explains:

• What dialectics are and why they matter
• The difference between dissonance and balance
• How black-and-white thinking increases distress
• How dialectical thinking supports emotional regulation
• The role of dialectics within DBT skills and recovery

Includes practical examples related to:

• Emotional overwhelm
• Relationship conflict
• Fear of abandonment
• Validation and communication
• Self-worth and mistakes
• Recovery and therapy ambivalence

Perfect for:

• DBT and emotion regulation work
• Anxiety and distress tolerance
• Complex trauma and PTSD recovery
• Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)
• Therapy homework and psychoeducation
• Clinicians teaching DBT concepts

Clear, engaging, and highly practical, this handout helps people understand that emotional growth often comes from balancing acceptance AND change — not choosing one or the other.

Developed by Dr Al Griskaitis and Jessica O'Garr for The Psych Collective